Second to none

I had been living in Switzerland for about a week when I first heard the gut-wrenching term “secondo”.  Technically it refers to the children of the immigrants who moved to Switzerland in the 50ies and 60ies, who even if born here are not Swiss but “secondos”, ie, second generation immigrants.

Unlike in the US and in many countries in Europe, no “foreigner” who is born here is Swiss, they will be able to apply for passport and citizenship once they are 18, just like any foreigner who moves here later in life and can apply for citizenship after 12 years.  That means you have people in their 50ies who have lived here their whole life, native speakers, people who have nowhere else to call home, who actually are not Swiss citizens nor passport holders.  Some do have a passport. Many don`t and many refuse to get one because they disagree with the system. I have seen this only too often.

In practice, this term implies somehow “second best”. As if we are sitting in the center of the world here. So we have the “Swiss-Swiss” and the non Swiss, secondos, immigrants, expats & co.

Last time I had heard of a similar two-class society it was in secondary school on my history book when a certain movement born in Germany in the 30ies started to refer to a part of the “original” population as “Aryan race”. We know how far that concept went.

An episode of last week is a clear example of the status quo. We are planning the refurbishment of our house and have been talking to a few builders. One in particular, who introduces himself as a “secondo”, Italian origin - although when talking to him I have to suppress the urge to correct him - is worth mentioning.  At the end of the meeting for some reason we mention that one of my cousins is a great architect. She lives and works in Italy, is a university professor, has a master degree and various post university degrees, works for beautiful projects around the globe. His reaction: “oh, I have been looking for a secretary; you can tell her if she is interested.”

So perhaps I am wrong but is he thinking that because she is A- Italian (happily) living and having a very successful career in Italy as an architect and B – a woman, she would be interested in a job as the secretary of a builder in Switzerland (who with all due respect has never seen a university classroom)? Never mind that she is the actual expert. Incredible how some secondos bring wrong concepts forward.

Probably no need to comment further on this one.

There are hundreds of studies that show how key is for companies to have a diverse workforce, not just in terms of nationality, religion and the likes, but also in terms of diversity of thought, experience and mindset. Indicators point to clear economic benefits and better environment for companies that score high on the diversity front.

If this is true for companies, I am fairly sure it applies to societies and families too.

Let us do ourselves a favour and drop this daunting and nerve-wrecking “secondo” term.

I will tell my children that the fact that they live and breathe three cultures and are native speakers in three languages is a big asset, not a liability. They are Europeans, they are world citizens, they have an international family and background, they were born here because they come from educated parents who could have lived anywhere in the world and chose to live here mostly for logistics reasons after having travelled the world and lived in different countries. I will tell my kids to think hard before ever judging people based on the place of birth and on stereotypes.

I will tell them to travel the world, to live abroad, to ask and challenge the status quo, to ask why, always. To fear, if anything, ignorance, to fight prejudice and dangerous stereotypes.   

I will tell my kids to check out people's brains, not nationalities, places of birth or skin colour. 

M.

Don't expect to see a change if you don't make one

Increasingly we have seen media coverage on initiatives celebrating the strength of women, the resilience of mothers, the importance of time off for fathers and the importance of a healthy life balance to better perform, and to achieve an "integrated" work life equation. 

At last! We have come a long way from the previous generation, from the previous decade and actually, from 18 months ago, come to think of it. 2015 has been a very important year for topics related to diversity, gender equality and health versus productivity.

In 2015 HBR's ranking of CEOs has for the first time considered how companies score not only on the hard numbers, but also on "soft" facts (ESG performance) "In the past, our ranking was based exclusively on hard stock market numbers. We looked at total shareholder return, as well as the change in each company’s market capitalization. We liked the fact that the ranking was based solidly on data and not on reputation or anecdote. Yet it also felt incomplete, because it failed to account for the many aspects of leadership that go beyond mere market performance. And so this year we’ve tweaked things. We’ve added to the mix a measurement of each company’s environmental, social, and governance (ESG) performance."

We have seen many financial institutions jumping into the growing trend of socially responsible investing and best of all State Street launching a diversity gender balanced fund , which will track an index comprising companies that do a great job at advancing women through gender diversity on their boards of directors and in management in general. We have seen extensive research that shows that companies with gender-diverse leadership tend to outperform long-term companies that don’t so I am surprised these funds are only starting to emerge.

Bloomberg has set up a new team of journalists and analysts covering the topic diversity.

The ex Norway Prime Minister was interviewed and asked about the reasons behind the success of her country (beyond the obvious oil related wealth) as in the 80s Norway was nowhere close to where it is now, its economy weak and common people barely able to afford decent living. "Success comes from the fact that you see fathers pushing strollers at 3 pm on a working day" she said. "What has changed in these 30 years are family politics and work culture. Retaining talented women in the workforce, giving family benefits and allowing fathers to be fathers and workers without stigma. Shorter working days and flexible working, which results into creative and flexible thinking".

There is McKinsey research on how and why "Women matter" and the latest Mercer report "When women thrive businesses thrive" being presented at the WEF last week and discussed by the CEOs of Cisco, eBay, Marriot and the president of UBS Wealth Management, Jürg Zeltner: "One other thing we all found common ground on was retaining talented women. They leave the workforce after you’ve invested and trained them as many find that workplaces are not family-friendly. Our challenge is to keep them and make the workplace flexible and supportive of their needs and priorities."

So there is all the progress being made just cited above, the daily strong commitment of many of us to raise awareness on the challenges women face and to bring positive change in the world. All of it is still probably only a drop in the ocean but change is happening out there.

Out there.

Then there is me, and I know that like me many other women and working mothers at times have a similar behaviour.

Rewind of two weeks, Monday 11 January, 6am. My husband and I are getting ready for work, kids still – thankfully – asleep. My phone rings. Terror (not quite, but close...). Our current Monday babysitter's little child is sick so she won't be able to come today. And it is of course no problem, it happens. However, a well known feeling that I merrily refer to as "the cold –spine" starts taking over. We quickly and frantically go through our blackberries, our plan in these cases is to take half day off each to look after whichever child is at home, aim is to cancel the half day which would result in the lower damage for the rest of the week. We decide that I stay at home in the morning with our 9 months old baby, dialling in for a couple of meetings, and my husband stays at home in the afternoon, also dialling in when he needs. I let my boss know, who very nicely and empathically confirms it is no problem at all (she has been there too). I tell my colleagues and team. On we go with the plan. At 11 am my baby is happily playing on his mat babbling away while I dial in for an internal meeting. I dial in and immediately go on mute. I barely comment and step in only quickly for fear that someone might hear my baby gurgling cheerfully in the background. Why did I do that? Even if anyone heard the baby chuckle, so what? They all knew where I was and why. I am not that junior or young any more or shy or lacking self confidence. So why did I try and hide the fact that as a working mum this too can be part of my life and it is really no big deal, in fact, hat off really for pushing through and balancing it all??!

Fast-forward to 4pm. The above nearly forgotten and not even yet properly processed. I have now been in the office for a couple of hours and my husband at home for 2 hours and taken as well a (video) call. I call him asking how the afternoon is going. "Oh great actually! Baby M. was sitting on my lap during my call, they loved him and he behaved really well."

No need to comment, I think these two episodes speak for themselves. Perhaps I will add that I am proud of how my husband handled the situation and a little less proud of how I did not stand up to my ideals.

So here is my lesson learnt and a better version of myself has come out of it.

Change, real change, starts from us and from how we expect the world to view us. We all have a lot more responsibility and impact on driving change than we often think.

M.

Editing Life. Less Means Luxury.

History. As a student I always wondered why during history classes we were focusing so much on dates and battles and who won what piece of land, and less, or zero, on the effect all those terrible events had on people and their habits. What effects did the Second World War have on our grandparents' lifestyle and life choices?

What are people likely to do after a decade of poverty and deprivation? What will they be keen to run after once the economy starts growing again and while the difficult memories of the past are still vivid in their minds? Buy. Stock up. Splurge. Own things. Just for the sake of being able to do it in most cases. We have probably all had someone in the family that after any world tragedy suggests to go raid the local supermarket, just in case the shops run out of food?

Is it a coincidence that post second world war, in a time where - my grandparents tell me – unlike today, white bread was for the wealthy and brown bread for the poor, where people struggled to have decent meals, we had curvy women as icons of beauty? Sophia Loren came right out of that time. She represented the new rich, embodying redemption from years of hunger. Fast forward 50 years, as a teenager I remember only too well wondering why on earth anorexic, bony ladies a là Kate Moss were considered beauty icons. Because we had and could afford anything and had access to great amounts of food, so we iconized what we could not have easily. Add a decade and the advent of the internet as main distributor of quick knowledge (Dr. Google anyone?) and we all are experts when it comes to healthy eating and healthy icons. The Romans had it right all along with their "mens sana in corpore sano" a two thousand-year-old statement. Are we now in a much happier and balanced place and able to edit our own life because of the Internet? Somehow I guess we are.

One of the factors that fueled the prosperity of the Fifties was the increase in consumer spending. The US first and shortly after Europe, enjoyed a standard of living that had never been seen before. In a decade many women across Europe went from hand-washing in rivers to owning a washing machine and being able to hire domestic help.

Spending patterns changed overnight. The adults of the Fifties had grown up in conditions of economic deprivation, first due to the general poverty following World War I and then due to the rationing of consumer goods of World War II. During WWII, much of Europe`s productive capacity shifted to armaments. Everything from sugar to gasoline to tires to nylon stockings was rationed. When consumer goods became available again, people wanted to spend.

How many times have I heard my own grandmother saying that the reason why she has been for so long a devoted boutique client since the day the first one opened in her neighbourhood is due to the fact that while growing up there was no such a thing as buying new clothes: post WWII going to the tailor for new clothes was a yearly much awaited occasion. Her wardrobe is three times mine now and I am probably being conservative. Her generation has witnessed the shift from a production society, focused on meeting basic needs, to a consumption society, which emphasizes customers' wants.  

We are now experiencing the next logical – and opposite - step, what has the manic consumerism of the past 50 years led to? Books like All You Need is Less (Madeleine Somerville) or The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying: a simple, effective way to banish clutter forever (Marie Kondo) have been best-sellers from the first day they hit Amazon, or the local bookshop if you are the classical type.

How much money do we spend on storage space? In Milan renting a couple of square meters for storage costs nearly two thousand euros a year, the monthly salary of a high school teacher. These storage buildings, picturesquely called La Casa delle Cose (The house of things) in Italy,  are popping up everywhere, leveraging on the attachment that we have for our "stuff" and the difficulty we have to get rid of it, to let go of our "possessions".

Since having kids we have often had family visiting. My very personal challenge is not so much getting rid of our own clutter, that I gladly do and a red carpet awaits me at our local second-hand shop every time I go to donate bags of "stuff", but in pushing back on daily presents for the kids, on the amount of clothes and various items that everyone visiting our house seems to be forgetting here. Either because they are flying back somewhere and cannot take liquids back or because they bought so much during their visit that their previous belongings do not fit anymone in their suitcase(s) ("is that OK if I pick it up when I come back in 12 months?") or because they think it is easier to leave entire suitcases of clothes and assorted items in the various places they visit. Especially in my house and in that irresistible one wardrobe I try to leave half empty for guests.

One way or the other, we are all slowly realizing that our own possessions are quickly taking over our life and costing us money, time, space – mental and physical. I now consider luxury and status symbol a half empty wardrobe. Do we own our possessions or do they own us? How do we get back on track and afford opposite luxuries than our post-war grandparents?

Watch this funny TedTalk on the topic "Less Stuff More Happiness".

M.

Mindset shifts

A short post today about one of the most important topics being currently discussed in our world: the future of the workforce.

Change is happening. It`s a matter of how much and how long some of us will resist to it. Neither economies nor businesses want to be the next Kodak. Who wants to miss out on progress?

More on the topic soon!

M.

Childcare and the privilege of pressure

This time it was all planned. This time we were going to have everything organized and taken care of.

This second time my return to work post maternity leave was going to be smooth. Considering we were about to start new jobs, it had to be. We had it all sorted. It took 10 months to plan. It lasted one day.

In Switzerland maternity leave allowance is normally three months. Yes a “generous” three months. In my company the allowance available is exceptionally up to six months. The average EU mother has and takes 12 months leave, considering countries like Germany where parental leave is up to 3 years, although most mothers take 10-12 months, countries like Italy and the UK where it`s normally 1 year and countries like Spain where it`s around 6 months.  And considering countries which are 100 years ahead like the Nordics where parental leave can be shared, fathers can take 3 months off without stigma, flexible working is a reality and not a career killer and results are not based on face time, childcare is available, high level and affordable for everyone. 

Per se Switzerland´s 3 – 6 months would not even be too extreme if the support network around parents and childcare arrangements were functioning well or in some cases existed at all. If mothers and fathers who decide to invest in their careers had it a tad easier, going back to work a few weeks after birth would be possible without major headaches. In a country where nursery schools are mainly private (unless you fall under a certain income threshold, and only about 10-15% of the population does, in that case you could apply for one of the few subsidized nursery places, well before you plan to get pregnant), where the 0 – 5 care is fully and only up to the parents, it is not a surprise that only 25% of the women return to work after the first child, and less after child number two. 

The childcare bill is on the high end, come June, when our second son will start nursery, we will have a monthly CHF 6000 bill only for two nursery schools, 7.30 to 6pm, and we are not in the most expensive school. No, it is not in line with average salaries, it is well above, this the reason why mothers in the workforce are so scarce in full time or executive roles. The same goes for the majority of the working parents we know, mostly affluent or above, and still. That does not include a possible nanny to help with late work days, sick days, school holidays (12 weeks a year for which you still pay school fees). Nannies cost between 20 and 40 CHF per hour and most importantly it is not easy to find a person to whom you leave for the whole day your children, your house and your car while you are gone. Of course there are some amazing people and professionals out there, and we were blessed until now, but what an adventure to find them?

We are lucky to be able to afford this so that we can both have the choice and continue with our careers. But it is little wonder that a strikingly high number of mothers list costs as reason number one for deciding to take care of their kids themselves and stay at home, in many cases giving up to her aspirations and careers. Reason two and three being the pressure from the employer, from society, and of course from themselves. Yes, society. It was a family doctor in his 40s who told me with a grave voice “Why are you doing this to your family? Can you not just stay at home.” when I asked for vitamins as I was feeling slightly exhausted the first few months after my return, the lack of sleep, the weekly nursery bugs of my first baby and the long work days were tough.

Switzerland is an amazing country and we chose to stay here in Zurich instead of London, Milan, Frankfurt for example, because of the many advantages it offers. But one thing that this country is missing is realizing the potential of the many amazing talents who because of the above we are losing daily. While it is a great country for having a family for example, it is very far from being a good country for working mothers and fathers. Here a good article with stats about this.

After our first son was born, I returned to work after 5 months for 3 days a week for a short period of time, before going back to full time, we had a part-time nursery school and were positive that things would just work out fine. They do for some families, they didn`t for us. This first particular school we had in order to “stay competitive” accepted sick children, in some cases highly infectious children – the normal standard of care states that when visibly sick children should be sent home. This meant that my son hardly ever went to school as he was sick every other day, we paid for the nursery school to keep the place and we paid for a nanny who helped when he was sick to go to the school that weekly made him sick. An interesting loop. Until we cancelled the school and got stung with 3 months "exit fee" anyway although my son had been there 20% of the time while he was still enrolled. So nanny and family stepped in until our little man and his immune system were able to cope with the daily bombardment of nursery school germs.

Aware of the above and of the fact that this time I was going back to work full time, a few months before baby 2 came we started looking for a full time nanny who could take care of him the whole day for the first 14 months of life, until he would start nursery school. We made our choice and our new nanny started a few weeks after our second little boy was born. I was keen to have her with us during my maternity leave so that we could all get used to each other. Things worked, she was doing a very good job, the kids liked her and I felt in good hands. The plan was waterproof, older child in nursery school full time, 5 months baby at home with the nanny and family a few days a month when and if needed.

I went back to work on October 1st. On October 2nd I almost choked on my coffee while reading a text from our nanny, who was off that week as my family was with the kids, who asked if we could meet for coffee the next day.

I just knew. I have to say I totally understand her reasons and there is nothing none of us could have probably done differently. She was about to go back to the corporate world as had been offered a great job by a very good company. What can one say? Is there a prize for worst timing?

What was I supposed to do with my job and my baby? Our place at the nursery school would not be available until June, that was only ...8 months to go. I was now back at work, to a new job too, and had very little time to interview or “try” nannies. Once again one of our blessings, family, and a friend whom I cannot consider anything else than family, came in. But how many parents can rely so quickly on their families really? We will find a new nanny of course, but could timing have been worse? Why do many parents have to cope with and live in a constant house of cards when it comes to childcare?

To make things easier, within the first week of me going back, our then 5 months old baby started to:

- Wake up between 4 and 8 times a night (he had been a superb sleeper since birth and until then)

- Refuse formula (which we had often been given as a little top up and were now trying to increase)

- Demand milk the whole night and refuse it during the day (while I was away)

Only who has been there knows what it means to survive on little, interrupted sleep for months on end and try and perform at work and be on top of your life. It is a type of exhaustion, effort and pressure that cannot be explained. Thankfully, like everything else, you get used to it. Almost.

Everything beyond kids and work becomes secondary unfortunately. A particularly gifted journalist like Carolyn Hax, was  able to explain why parents really have little time and what they can do about it (guess?). Here is a great read.

However, I have now known for some time, while stressful, pressure can be good. In fact, pressure can be a privilege.

One of my favourite entrepreneurs, Mr Branson just wrote an illuminating post:

"The other day someone asked me how I deal with pressure. Without thinking over my response, I said that pressure is a privilege – which really is a great way to think positively and proactively about any challenge. When we are faced with exciting scenarios and situations, dealing with the stress that they bring can lead us to be more alert, alive and attentive. It can help to improve our performance."

"You need to balance high-pressure periods with plenty of time for rest, reflection and recuperation, or else you won’t be able to switch off and get perspective. This is partly why work-life balance and spending time away from the office is so important," he says.

"And remember: When the stakes are higher, the rewards are greater — and the journey is more enjoyable."

M.

Einstein's 8th Wonder of the World

One of the many interesting guest-posts I will be hosting here. Thanks to Chris Sinclair from AimCFO.com. 

“Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. He who understands it, earns it … he who doesn’t … pays it.” – Albert Einstein. Try to picture Einstein as this reality began to hit him.

Most people never pause long enough to consider the significance of this statement. Those that do usually only look at it from one perspective and that being money.

Money

Money is one of those things that we all need at least some of and often seem to be lacking, at least from our perspective. Yet we often treat money as if it rules over us. We cannot seem to control how we spend and often don’t even think about saving. Yet saving money to prepare for the future is really something we all should be doing, and, as Einstein observed, these savings compound.

For example, assume you put aside $2,000 at the beginning of each year and receive 10% interest on the balance at the end of each year. I know 10% may be dreaming, but I’m using it for easy of demonstration. At the beginning of year 1 you have $2,000 but at the end of that year you have $2,200 ($2,000 + $200 interest). In year 2 you add another $2,000 for a total of $4,200. However, at the end of year two you receive interest not just on the $4,000 in principle you have added ($400), you also receive interest on the first year interest of $20 ($200 x 10%). You will have $4,620 after 2 years. If you carry this out for 20 years you will have $126,005. Of that you have contributed $40,000 in principle ($2,000 x 20), earned interest on the principle contributions of $42,000, and earned interest on the interest of $44,005.

Notice that most of your balance at the end of 20 years is from interest on interest. The balance of $126,005 is composed of $40,000 you contributed, $42,000 was earned on the principle you contributed and $44,005 was earned on the interest you accumulated. That is a demonstration of the power of compounding when it comes to money.

Compounding however is about More than Money.

While we typically think about the power of compounding in terms of money, it really applies to other aspects of life. Here are a few:

NETWORKING – As we build our personal and business networks we find that both opportunities and results compound. Each new relationship opens the door to more relationships which in turn open the door to even more. This is a playing out of the concept of six degrees of separation, which says that on average we are approximately six steps away, by way of introduction, from any other person in the world. We have more opportunities to help others and more people to help us. On top of that, we have more resources within our reach. As long as we build those networks with the correct motives (that is not just what’s in it for us), we are using the power of compounding in a fruitful and honest manner.

BUSINESS GROWTH – Have you ever noticed how a business suddenly seems to take off? While much of that is attributable to the efforts of management and employees, there is one thing that is somewhat beyond their total control – customers. As customers use a product of service, they frequently spread the word to others. Those people in turn spread the word to more and so on. As you see, this spreading of the word by customers is really a demonstration of the power of compounding. Of course, it is important to remember that this works both ways. If a customer is unhappy with us, we can quickly find the negativity spreading in a compound manner. This is a key reason that we need to be in regular contact with customers to address potential problems before they have the opportunity to compound.

PERSONAL REPUTATION – Just like networking and business growth, the personal impression we make on people has the potential to multiply exponentially. If someone has poor integrity, the word will spread. If another has a reputation for honesty and going the extra mile, this too will spread. This is really the idea behind a company checking personal references as well as business references for potential employees.

It’s Like Magic.

Actually, this heading is not exactly correct. While the power of compounding may seem magical at times, it really is a very logical process. Unfortunately it is lost on many people and companies. That is sad as they miss many opportunities to help others and get the help they need.

Think about it, and I think you will agree with Einstein that compounding is the eighth wonder of the world. Are you considering this as you go about your daily life?

M. (re-post)